I Will Not Suffer In Silence

This morning, george punched me in the stomach a few times to let me know he’ll be arriving in the next 48 hours.

In the weight category, I’m back up to 182 pounds, having gained 3 pounds back just in this past week alone, because of the impending arrival of george, a.k.a. GirlDo0m. The PMS cravings haven’t helped. The lack of bicycling due to cold weather and pre-GirlDo0m fatigue hasn’t helped.
And the depression hasn’t helped.

This folks is what I like to call “downtime”.

I hope george arrives sooner than his expected arrival date of Monday, because I do NOT want to be cramping while trying to take a state teacher exam on the 18th.

Forces have conspired against me; namely, george. These forces are saying, “Please try to make yourself comfortable in downtime. Moving about the cabin will not be permitted without dire repercussions. Medication WILL be provided. Thank you.”

So I’m sitting here, feeling the low-level cramping, and Waiting For It.
I have a feeling I’m not going to be able to focus on my studies today as intensely as I did yesterday.

6:36pm Edit: I was right. I spent the next eight hours researching stuff other than my studies. Go me.

I’ve got predicates coming out of my ears.
The sad part of my studying is that I’ve not really studied much besides English and History.
There are three tests that I am registered for on March 18th. The first test is reading, language, literature, history and social science.
The second test is science and math. The third test is physical education, human development and visual/performing arts.

I registered to take all three tests in the same day, because I thought that’s what had to be done. The Fellows told us after the fact that no, we can break up the subjects into different test dates. But they didn’t state this on their website, unless I missed it. But I’m not the only one, since others at the interview mentioned they’d registered for everything at once, too.

The Fellows say that if one fails a test, one has two chances to make it up.
Of course, one has to pay for that portion of the test again.

And then the worst case scenario: I could find out that I’ve spent the money to take and/or retake the test(s) in futility, if the Fellows decide not to hire me.

And yet, I go on. I forced two more hours of study tonight.

What other choice do I have right now?

A few years ago, I was on an email list which required as one’s first post to answer several personal questions. I went searching for this list, and thanks to the power of Google, I found a bastardised version, which I’ve further bastardised here.

Hmmm, who is this Steph person?

1. CURRENT LIVING ARRANGEMENT

Renting an apartment with my boyfriend.

2. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?

All sorts of history books in preparation for a big test.

3. FAVORITE BOARD GAME?

Scrabble

4. FAVORITE MAGAZINE

National Geographic

5. FAVORITE SMELLS?

The ‘it’s going to rain’ smell, coffee, cloves and allspice type scents in food or potpourri, sandalwood, freshly laundered linens, food cooking with onions or garlic.

6. LEAST FAVORITE SMELLS?

Cigarette smoke, pot smoke, feces, cooking cabbage, brussel sprouts, ‘wet dog’, mildew, vomit.

7. WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD?

Fear

8. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING?

“Aww crap, what do I have to do today? I don’t wanna do anything.”

9. FAVORITE COLOR?

Dark saphire blue

10. HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE?

2 - 3

11. WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT IN LIFE?

Being able to develop one’s Self.

12. FAVORITE FOODS?

Pizza, cake, cookies, sushi, chocolate, “natural” cheetos, Trader Joe’s white cheddar popcorn, Cocquille De Mar at Moss Beach Distillery.

13. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA

Chocolate

14. DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST?

Only on the highway

15. STORMS - COOL OR SCARY?

Cool!

16. WHAT TYPE WAS YOUR FIRST CAR?

Lincoln Mercury Tracer

17. IF YOU COULD MEET ONE PERSON DEAD OR ALIVE?

The person who started my mother’s paternal lineage.

18. FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK?

Chambord & vodka

19. WHAT IS YOUR ZODIAC SIGN?

Virgo

20. DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI?

No.

21. IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB YOU WANTED WHAT WOULD IT BE?

Genealogist

22. IS THE GLASS HALF EMPTY OR HALF FULL?

Half full

23. FAVORITE MOVIE?

The Others

24. DO YOU TYPE WITH YOUR FINGERS ON THE RIGHT KEYS?

Mostly. The only one I don’t do correctly is ‘B’. I use my right index finger instead of my left for ‘B’.

25. WHAT’S UNDER YOUR BED?

The floor (We don’t have a platform or frame; the box spring rests on the floor).

26. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER?

Twenty-three (Hail Eris)