I stayed home

When the alarm went off at 5:30am, I got up and stood in the kitchen for a few minutes. I decided it wasn’t worth it and went back to bed. I got up again to call my boss at 7am – no answer. I left a message on her machine and the general manager’s voicemailbox. They never called back so I guess I am approved the day off.

I woke up sometime after 10am. I called my dad (returning his calls to check up on me over the weekend) and again got the response “well you better go in tomorrow even if you have to crawl in.” He’ll never know what I go through – I don’t expect him to understand. That’s why I took out another credit card just before surgery. It’s so I have extra money to pay back either surgery costs that insurance didn’t cover or pay my father back if I lose my job again.

I also called the surgeon and I’m waiting for a call back. Just want her input on the pain situation.
I’m hungry but I don’t want anything to eat. I’m in pain but I have to eat before I can take pain meds. So I’m eating pudding.

Today is Paczki Day. I haven’t had a Paczki since moving to California from Detroit. This saddens me further. The nearest Polish bakery is either in San Francisco or Concord. I’m in no condition to drive and I’m sure their Paczki are inferior to where I grew up, anyway.
Hah, not that my body would like the doughnuts anyway, now that I’m on a gluten-free diet. But in my mental state, it’s just one more thing to prove the world is out to get me.

I wish george was dead. I hope I’m killing him with every Yasmin pill I take. I hope the Yasmin doesn’t kill the rest of my body with george. Then he’d still win, the bastard.

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