I Will Not Suffer In Silence

I have been bedridden since Monday. The pain started on Sunday and that’s when the Vicoprofen pill-popping began.

George subsided overnight, and there was nothing this morning. Thank [insert deity here], since I’d already spent three full days bleeding like a stuck pig. Last month, I’d only bled that much for two days.

I tried to go to work today but came home 2 hours later in a lot of pain, and went back on the Vicoprofen.

I was in class around 10am when suddenly I felt a warm trickle. My eyes went wide and I said, “Something’s happening, I have to leave!” and I staggered to the bathroom. The pain was already setting in by the time I got to inspect the damage.
Sure enough, george was back, and full on. I had brought extra pads to work, and I had my meds with me, but there was no way I was gonna stick around with the pain ramping up the way it was.

I told my co-teacher to reduce the class size to six children, and then I went to each classroom and told them that I was leaving for the day, so they would not send any more children out to my class. I informed the office and the lunch supervisor that I would be leaving. I tried unsuccessfully to get a substitute teacher for the lunch rush, and was told it’s okay, just go home.
So I grabbed my bags and well, they were heavy as hell. Stupid me, packing so much crap. I’d brought all my homework with me, as well as my laptop, with the optimism in my head this morning that I would not be in any further pain, and that I could get some homework done on my lunch break.
Stupid me.

While I was grabbing my bags, the librarian asked me if I was okay (the lockers for the teachers is located in the back of the library). I told her no, but it’s not contagious. She chuckled. I said that I have endometriosis. She knew immediately what that meant – she said “Ohhh. I had that.”
She proceeded to tell me that she’d had surgery to no avail, and that it was so bad that it had pulled her bladder out of place. She said she’d finally gone a couple of years ago and just gotten a full hysterectomy and is better, now. She said she needed reconstructive work on her bladder and everything. *shudder*

The librarian referred me to her surgeon, and I thanked her and set off with my heavy bags, whimpering and setting them down in the kitchen. I have to say that it is exceedingly rare when my optimism turns out for me. It’s much easier to be a full time pessimist, seriously. Had I been pessimistic, I wouldn’t be standing there in the kitchen with two heavy bags, ready to cry at the thought of hauling them a block and a half back to my car, because I’d not have brought them to work to begin with, knowing full well I’d be in pain again.
But no. Month in and month out, I have this stupid hope that THIS TIME, the pain will be less or won’t last as long or what-have-you.

I left the bags in the kitchen at work and informed the secretary of said bags. I told her I was going to go get my car, then come back and pick up the bags.

I staggered out the front door of the school with a parent eyeballing me on the way out, and made my way slowly down the street. I got to the light half a block down and just as I was about to cross the street, it turned yellow. I stumbled and turned, walking into the street’s bike lane, and began walking up the street. After a few steps, I decided this was probably a bad idea, so I made my way to the curb towards the sidewalk.

It was at this point that the financial director of the school came up the street after me, and asked if I was okay and what I was doing. I told her I was trying to get to my car but it’s so far away and I’m in a lot of pain. She told me her truck was right here on the street, and that she’d give me a ride to my car. Then she asked if I’d like a ride home. I told her that decisions and logical thinking were really not on my side at the moment, due to the level of pain I was in. I still hadn’t popped any pain medication at this point, either. Why? This is what chronic pain does to the brain. It is at times like this that the person suffering needs an advocate to help with medication, transportation – even eating.
The financial director told me she’d drive me to get my bags, then drive me home. She pulled around to the front of the school, ran inside, grabbed my bags, and took me home.
On the way home, I told her I’d spoken to the librarian. She replied with “Ohhh yeah she had it REALLY bad, and finally had the surgery and took the whole summer off to recover.” I told the financial director that the librarian had given me a referral to her surgeon. She told me she has the same surgeon – that he delivered both of her daughters, and that she absolutely loves the guy.

Well! Two gleaming reviews for the same surgeon in one day! And he’s in my insurance network! I’ll have to check him out. His name is Hank Streitfeld.

The financial director drove me home, unloaded my bags and carried them to my doorstep for me. I thanked her profusely.

I think I’ve averaged about 1-2 Vicoprofen pills per day since Sunday. I take half a pill at a time because if I take a whole pill, I have severe breathing problems.

The pain was so bad for me Sunday night that I took too much Vicoprofen within a short time frame. I had taken a half pill, but it was taking too long to kick in, so about 20 minutes later, I took the other half. When both halves kicked in, the nightmare began. I had a hard time breathing, I was very dizzy which at times turned to vertigo, I was nauseated as a result of the vertigo, I was on the verge of hallucinating, I was seriously agitaged and whiny, I was paranoid, depressed, and I had to pee a lot.

Now, take all those side effects listed above and put me in a compact car in the dark on over 100 miles of winding road near the ocean in the Autumn when all form of nocturnal wildlife are present in and near the roadway. For six hours.

Yeah. Worst drug trip since the oxycodone incident back in 2006.

Going back to the beginning of this month, when I began taking the Vicoprofen, I had noted, “The test run with Vicoprofen so far has vague similarities to when I was taking Darvon back in November/December 2007 and Codeine Sulfate back in February, 2008; in the past two days I have experienced headaches, jaw pain, heart palpitations, and anxiety leading close to panic attacks. I knew better than to take a whole pill at once, otherwise I’d have also experienced the feeling of being drowned/suffocated as hydrocodone is wont to do to me. I would like to note that although I’ve had strange dreams, I have not had horrible nightmares while on this medication…Right now on half a pill, I can still feel the low back pain clearly, but the pelvic pain has subsided. I can still feel pain in my eyes and head. I’m very tired, getting shaky and dizzy because of my refusal to go lie down when on this medicine. So I’m gonna quit now and go lie down.”

I don’t recall any after-effects from the Vicoprofen at the beginning of the month.
However, NOW…the after-effects of Vicoprofen is severe depression and severe constipation.
The constipation is so bad that I thought I was birthing aliens out of my ass. I will leave the results of that to your imagination. Ouch.

So unfortunately, once again, I have to put the Vicodin down and step away.

This probably leaves me with Tylenol 3 all over again.

I have no idea where the FDA currently stands on its acetaminophen ban – I know that the FDA stopped taking public input back on September 30, 2009. Now it’s wait and see.

My last liver enzyme test (October 2009) came back normal, so the continued goal is to try to take more Ibuprofen than Tylenol 3 if I can help it, to manage the pain. I know that Ibuprofen damages the kidneys and G.I. tract…I really am stuck between a rock and a hard place until I find alternative treatment that works, or until I can afford to do surgery again.

Hmmm.

Let’s have a look at this… what is the difference between Vicoprofen and Tylenol 3?

RxList shows the ingredients in Vicoprofen to be Hydrocodone bitartrate and Ibuprofen.

RxList shows the ingredients in Tylenol 3 to be Codeine phosphate and Acetaminophen.

Okay, okay, so ANYTHING with Hydrocodone in it is BAD for me.

But wait…can’t I just remove the Acetaminophen in Tylenol 3, leaving me with Codeine phosphate?

Didn’t I try Codeine phosphate before?

I searched my journal and found Codeine sulfate, but not Codeine phosphate.

WELL! Time to give my gyn a call and see if she can prescribe Codeine phosphate!

Time to also give my friend’s acupuncturist a call – my friend has endo and said her acupuncturist has done wonders for her through the needles and Chinese herbs. I’ve gone the acupuncture route before, and I’ve taken Chinese herbs. But maybe this acupuncturist is different, and has different herbs that might work better for me. All I can do is try.

I’m also severely overdue for a liver/kidney detox through my Qigong practitioner. I need to get regular with those, and that means four times a year, on time.

I’m going to have to ask the husband for help financially for this stuff.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, October 28th, 2009 at 9:44 pm and is filed under Doctors, Employment, Endometriosis, Medications, Nausea. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.