I am a can of mystery meat

I had it in my head that I have been experiencing nausea for the past month, even when I am not on my menstrual cycle, and that this must somehow be a new development.

Then I got word of the MRI results, saying I have cysts in my liver, kidney, cervix, and I have an endometrioma on my left ovary. I thought for sure the nausea had to be tied to one or more of those, but fixated on the endometrioma, because I recalled being pretty nauseated in the past when dealing with ‘regular’ ovarian cysts.

So yesterday I’d had enough of the nausea – it got so debilitating that I could not read my homework anymore. Friends on facebook asked if I’d contacted a doctor about this. Uh..no, I haven’t, heh! So I did.

My local doctor’s office – the on-call doctor of the day – called me back after 9pm last night, and I asked him if he could prescribe Cesamet, which I heard about through a Canadian endometriosis buddy a couple of years ago.
He said no, his office doesn’t touch the stuff. He went on to say he did not think my nausea is being caused by the endometrioma or the liver or kidney cysts. He said he has never heard of nausea being brought on by an ovarian cyst, and says he’s been practicing medicine for many years. He was condescending and talked down to me and was authoritative, and suggested something else is going on that I should get checked out for. He said I should come in for a checkup. In the meantime, he suggested I try taking peppermint tea or ginger tea for the nausea. I told him I’ve already done that to no avail. He then sent in a prescription for Phenergan. I looked it up and decided the side effects were once again worse than the problem, and so I will not chance taking the stuff. Remember that I am the person who hallucinates on Tagamet and could only handle 6-8mg of any SSRI medication at a time without severe side effects, and over the long term, I am *still* trying to recover from the two years I spent on SSRIs.

ANYWAY, so Phenergan is out.

This morning, one of my gynecologist’s minions assistants called me back, and I talked to him about the nausea. He was MUCH more diplomatic than the local asshat doctor. He said that their office does not have experience with prescribing Cesamet, and so he unfortunately could not help me with that. He also said it seemed unusual that I should be experiencing nausea with an ovarian cyst. He told me that he felt the endometrioma was way too small to be causing problems for me at this stage. He also doubted that the liver and kidney cysts could be stirring up nausea, but he suggested I speak with a gastroenterologist if I am still concerned. I thanked him for his time and we hung up.

Gastroenterology, eh? Well I’ve already ordered the liver and kidney detox supplements, and they’re on their way. So I’ll try that first, before hiring on yet another specialist.

Today, just to say I have covered all my bases, I contacted one of the two Cannabis dispensaries I am registered with under Prop 215, but they would not speak to me by phone, and said I’d have to visit in person or send an email. So I emailed both dispensaries to ask if they carry or can get Cesamet. No one is available to take me to the dispensaries today, and I’m in no shape to go out on my own.

I do not have confidence that the dispensaries can get Cesamet.

This leaves me wondering about the nausea. So I searched my own blog, and was frustrated to find that I had posted about this 98 times throughout the life of my journal! I went back and made a category for this one keyword, to make it easier for me to search next time. Ugh.

So what does this mean?

This means that the nausea is nothing to be alarmed by, whether it’s on cycle or off. I usually had this only on cycle, but apparently having nausea between cycles – it’s just part of living with endometriosis.

Go me.

I am truly frustrated and feeling at my wits’ end by having to continue residing in this meatsack. I feel I am reaching the bottom of the emotional pit this month. I hope that means that after today, the pain and bleeding will ease up, and I will be able to emerge once again from the Underworld.

Each month that I must pass through the Underworld, I grow weary of ever making it back out alive again. I fear that one of these days, I’m just going to give up and make it my permanent home out of sheer exhaustion with having to battle this illness.

2 Responses to “I am a can of mystery meat”

  1. Rachael

    Hello
    I too have an endometrioma and nausea. The nausea comes and goes but has only been present since my endometrioma started causing pain. My gyn also said it shouldn’t be a symptom, but I’ve been tested for infection and nothing was found. It does seem to get worse with the pain so maybe just a reaction to the pain. I just wanted you to know you’re not alone. Maybe it’s rare but I know my nausea is related to the cyst.

  2. steph

    Thank you for the validation, Rachael! My apologies in taking so long to approve/reply to your comment. Do you have a blog or social networking site I can friend you on?