Update on the premenstrual pain

Yesterday was the worst pain day, yet. I took a total of 2 Tylenol 3 plus 1,400mg Ibuprofen to get through the day yesterday. The pain was stabby and sharp at times, continuous and gnawing all of the time. I would estimate the pain was at a 7 on the pain scale all day yesterday. I had moments where it spiked to 8 on the scale. I had low grade nausea for much of the day.

Still, not wanting to have my warm sunny weekend taken away from me, I ventured out of the house to go to the post office and to the bank. Within the first 200 feet, I was grunting from the pain. Every single step was painful, but I pushed on to my car and drove to the errands I had to do. On a day like this, I should be riding the half mile to the post office and the bank, but I was in such pain that I had to drive it. When I came home, I was near tears from the pain, and that’s when I began the serious medicating for the day.

My husband drove us wherever we needed to go for the rest of the day. I did NOT want to stay indoors and lose another sunny day – I lose too many per year from chronic pelvic pain.

We went to a local dispensary to see what free services I could get under my Prop 215 card, since the cannabis is not working to lessen the pain. They have Reiki, acupuncture, hypnotherapy, and other stuff, but most of the classes are booked up, so I had to get on the waiting lists.

I think it was while we were on our way to the dispensary I suddenly realised that all this pain is likely due to an ovarian cyst, because the pain has been so focused on the right lower quadrant of my pelvic region, and has been stabby, and I had been nauseated all day.

Then we went on to our favourite coffee stop (Peerless – as opposed to Julie’s our favourite coffee and tea house – where we would actually be able to sit and stay awhile), then we went to the AT&T store to finally activate the iPhone my husband gave me so long ago. From there we went to Ikea to look for a bed frame but that was a bust. While we were at Ikea, I saw so many people in wheelchairs, and I REALLY wanted mine at that moment. Other pedestrians in the store were impatient by how slow I was walking, and would brush past me quickly. This made me want to cry, or worse, shout at them that I’m in a lot of pain and to leave me the hell alone.

I have a wheelchair but I refused to bring it with me yesterday because I’m still too proud to use it unless I’m in crying pain. Of course, when I’m in crying pain, I don’t actually leave the house, heh…so I have GOT to learn to not be embarrassed to use the wheelchair when I need it. And yesterday I really needed it.

After Ikea, we went to Endgame, then came back home, ate some dinner, and then went to a friend’s house for impromptu game night. I sat in the most comfy chair I could (a computer chair), but still was in a lot of pain, and had to get up and move around a lot.

With an ovarian cyst, the large hip circles don’t really work – in fact, I think they cause more pain.

When I got home, I had shooting pains on the left side, but higher up – like above the ovary or further. I used the bathroom and when I wiped, I found a dime-sized amount of bright yellow mucus.
This morning when I woke, I had clear, thick, abundant vaginal discharge, and I am no longer in any pelvic pain.

For me, I think this means I really did have an ovarian cyst, and it ruptured late last night.

Here’s hoping the pain is done and I get a few pain-free days before Friday, when my period is due!

Trying out Vicoprofen

It’s been a long weekend. Hell it’s been a long week. I have experienced severe pain and mild nausea every other day since last Monday. I missed work every other day last week. This is not normal for my cycle. Someone asked me if perhaps I have another ovarian cyst on top of the usual menstrual cycle – I would not be surprised if this is the case.

Let’s recap: spotting on Sunday Sept. 27 until Thursday Oct. 1.

Moderate flow developing to heavy flow on Oct. 1. Bedridden Oct. 1 as of 8:30pm and all day Oct. 2.

Heavy flow on Oct. 3 but pain stayed around 4.5 on the pain scale for much of the day, spiking to 6 a couple of times. I spent that day in class (I’m taking a Teacher level Montessori Practical Life class through the end of this month) and forced myself to make it through the entire day.

The pain and bleeding subsided by around 6pm on Oct. 3 and I felt well enough to consider going out dancing, if you can even believe that. I decided to take it easy and not mess with my good fortune, and went to a movie with my husband and a friend, instead. We saw Zombieland – haven’t laughed that hard in awhile. :)

The pain and bleeding never returned for the rest of the night.

I woke to pain on Sunday morning around 10am. The bleeding returned in a gush, as did the nausea. I forced myself to eat something so I could take the Vicoprofen I just got on Friday.

The pain hovered around 6.5 on the pain scale, but I decided to take only a quarter of the Vicoprofen and see how that would affect me, since when I tried half a pill on Friday, it knocked me completely out for hours.

A quarter of a pill did nothing for me even after half an hour, so while riding in the car with my husband to run errands, I took another quarter pill and waited.
Again a half an hour went by, and by this time I was crying from the pain, so I took another quarter pill. That one finally kicked in with the other quarters and I was dizzy and stoned.
My husband dropped me home when I could no longer stay upright, but I could not sleep. I was antsy and headachey and my eyes hurt and I was moody and had the nesting MUST CLEAN air about me. I cleaned the counter top in the kitchen, the bathroom sink, and THEN passed out for half hour to 45 minutes.

I got up after my husband went off to game night with his buddies. The bleeding had subsided again, but my head and eyes still hurt. I made myself dinner and felt comforted by the lovely smell of cornish hen cooking in the oven. I ate that entire hen. ;)

Immediately after eating, the pain returned once more, but the bleeding hasn’t ramped back up. I didn’t want to chance it, though, so I took half a Vicoprofen and inside of 20 minutes I was stoned. I had just enough time to type up this journal entry before becoming too stoned to carry on.

Someone had suggested a few months ago that I try Vicoprofen instead of Tylenol 3 – for two reasons: 1) My liver enzymes were really high in January 2008 and the doctor thinks it’s from taking Tylenol 3 every month for the past few years. 2) The FDA wants to ban opioid/acetaminophen combos because of the danger of liver damage/failure in patients.
So last week I called my gynecologist and asked to try Vicoprofen. Curiously, she said she’d never heard of the stuff before. She’s the same doctor who has let me run the gamut of meds to treat the endometriosis pain, so of course she said yes to the Vicoprofen.
I was bedridden on Friday but my neighbor was nice enough to go pick up the prescription for me.

The test run with Vicoprofen so far has vague similarities to when I was taking Darvon back in November/December 2007 and Codeine Sulfate back in February, 2008; in the past two days I have experienced headaches, jaw pain, heart palpitations, and anxiety leading close to panic attacks. I knew better than to take a whole pill at once, otherwise I’d have also experienced the feeling of being drowned/suffocated as hydrocodone is wont to do to me. I would like to note that although I’ve had strange dreams, I have not had horrible nightmares while on this medication.

I really hope all the pain and bleeding is over by tomorrow, because I need to go back to work or else the axe hangs ever closer regarding attendance issues again. I have not been threatened on this job for missing work on account of my illness, but it’s a constant fear that it’s only a matter of time. I’ve been with this school for 5.5 months. I’d like to make it to a year and start feeling comfortable and secure in my job placement.

I will continue to report on any side effects I may have with the Vicoprofen. Right now on half a pill, I can still feel the low back pain clearly, but the pelvic pain has subsided. I can still feel pain in my eyes and head. I’m very tired, getting shaky and dizzy because of my refusal to go lie down when on this medicine. So I’m gonna quit now and go lie down.

Oh…wait… before I forget – last month two different people suggested things for me to try to quell/cure the endometriosis pain. One suggested I go to Lourdes, France and bathe in the healing waters. Another suggested I try biofeedback. As you know, I keep a list of things I’ve tried to combat the pain of endometriosis, and I keep this list not just for me but to show others who ask “have you tried” that yes, more than likely I have in fact tried it. However, I won’t be able to afford a trip to Southern France anytime soon, so Lourdes isn’t feasible. Nor am I Catholic, nor do I believe in ‘miracles’, so Lourdes isn’t believable.
The biofeedback thing though has merit – in Susan Lark’s Fibroid Tumors and Endometriosis Self-help Book, she talks about the aid of biofeedback in managing pain.

So I’ll motivate myself to try that and add it to my list.

Suggestions are always welcome. Check my list first before suggesting I try this or that remedy. Some suggestions may be refused – with explanation as to why.

I really gotta go fall over now. Good night.

Combat armoury assembling sir!

I forgot to follow up on the disability thing. I tried to file for state and federal (Social Security) disability on March 16 and 17 respectively. I was turned down over the phone by state and got a rejection letter in the mail from federal after being grilled for an hour and a half by phone by them.

I am not shocked, nor surprised.

Today was the New Moon. I spent the day cleaning house (cuz even housecleaning stopped happening in the past month) and only putting healthy food in my body. I moved about calmly and deliberately and tried to remember to breathe and not feel so overwhelmed by life in general.

In general, I’m really bitter right now that I’m having pain again, not just pain mind you but continual pain. Before my surgery, I experienced moderate pain and fatigue up to two weeks before menses every month. Surgery brought that down to a few days before menses. This gave me back a week and a half of my life every month for two years until November 7, 2008, when complications from a bad ovarian cyst took hold, which left me debilitated for all of November. I experienced nine good days in December (not consecutive), then had a much better month both in January and February.

Now, something’s up again. Something is wrong. It’s not ovarian pain. It’s not a cyst.

At time of surgery, some endo was found right near the bladder. It was cauterised instead of cut out because the surgeon was afraid she’d puncture my bladder. Cauterising the surface tissue does nothing for the disease that’s deeper in. I know the endometriosis is growing and spreading again.
On top of getting pain two weeks before menses again, I’m now getting lots of bladder issues (frequent need to urinate but can’t, feeling of urinary tract infection (UTI) coming on). I’ve only had six good days this month (not consecutive). If a UTI were coming on, I’d have had it already. I used to get them all the time as a child (now known by endo experts as a possible early warning sign of endometriosis).

My annual gyn visit is in one month. I’m sick of doctors telling me I’m too pre-emptive with stuff, even though it turns out I’m usually right. But I’m going to wait on this one. I’m going to keep gathering evidence over on ReliefInsite.com and through my calendar and journal, and present it at my appointment, and demand my urine be checked for blood to rule out endo perforating the bladder. I’m going to get it definitively on paper how far my uterus is tipped (an ultrasound tech in December told me I have a tipped uterus but didn’t note it). I’m going to get it ruled out if possible if either A) endo pulled my uterus that way like it had done to my ovaries and/or B) the tipped uterus accounts for some of my pelvic pain (depending on how far tipped it is). If the discomfort worsens or doesn’t otherwise improve, I’m going to first rule out UTI and then demand Interstitial cystitis (IC) be ruled out, too. This means I will have to go for a cystoscopy and will have to have my potassium levels checked. My friend, who has IC, says he is confident that I do not have it. This of course reassures me greatly.

I spent time today reading about pH Balancing, and decided after seeing several websites advertising supplements for balancing, that I should just go down to the local hippy store and see what they have on tap. I came home with some pH strips and supplements for pH balancing. My first urine strip at 8pm came out to 7.5, which is in the high end of the normal range. I forgot to do the saliva test so I’ll do that later.

phrange

 

I also bought more goat milk yoghurt and flax oil, and will be starting up the Budwig Diet again (I let it lapse because I got tired of putting effort into food prep, but I must accept that’s my life, now).

Last night, I got to meet one of my husband’s high school friends whom he just reconnected with (it’s our 20-year anniversary this year, so classmates are popping up all over the place). She’s a physical trainer, and showed me some pelvic strengthening exercises.

Today I set calendar alerts on my cell phone to remind me to take my supplements, because I’ve fallen behind on that again, too.

I need to also set calendar alerts to remind me to do Qigong and Chi Nei Tsang every day, and the exercises my hubby’s friend showed me. I’ve been doing it when I remember, it’s not like I’m not doing it at all, but still.

I have a sneaking suspicion that after about three days of all these alerts going off, I’m going to become Edie in AbFab, throw the phone out the window, and scream GIVE ME BACK MY LIFE!!!

Stay tuned…

This past week, and looking forward

George arrived on Sunday, March 8 at 6:48pm. I’d been cleaning the house all afternoon in preparation for george, and documenting it for YouTube.

I’d been documenting different parts of the video all day as ideas and the script came to me, and getting excited as to how all the parts would fit together at time of edit. This was the first video I was creating that would have a soundtrack and voice over parts, and my confidence level was high – I would figure out how to put it all together in iMovie.

I was in the bedroom, photographing the stuff I would use to entertain myself with while bedridden, when suddenly my face and ears flushed. I felt stingingly hot and winded. I went to the bathroom and there was george – a day early. There was bright spotting at first, and the pelvic cramping returned. I immediately popped 600mg ibuprofen, dropped everything I was doing around the house, and zoomed off to the store to finish grocery shopping.

By the time I returned home an hour later, the pelvic pain was at 6.5 on the Mankoski Pain Scale. I can’t recall but I think I took Tylenol 3 before bed that night.

On Monday, I went from bright spotting to dark brown spotting, and then it turned bright red by evening time. I note this because all through 2008, I had dark brown coffee ground type material on my first two to three days of menses before the heavy bright red flow set in. And then it was November 7, 2008 when I was diagnosed with a 4cm ovarian cyst, which left me very ill throughout the month of November. I went on a detox diet for liver and kidneys that month, and by the end of November, the cyst had shrunk to 1.6cm.
I’ve had dark brown spotting on and off since November. I’ve only had one month so far that menses started off bright red and stayed that way throughout.
A healthy menstrual cycle is supposed to be nice and bright from day one of menstruation. The dark stuff means something not right is going on inside, such as a cyst. So I keep track of the colouration every month, now.

Going back further in time a bit – after my last day working over in Daly City, on Friday, March 6, I went to a health food store I always frequented when I used to live in that area ten years ago. I picked up some liquid iron supplement, and also purchased iron supplement pills. I spoke at length with the dietician running the register, and he told me that for my condition, my doctor would probably put me on 1,800mg “of the harsh stuff”, meaning the really constipating iron tabs. He sold me stuff that’s supposed to be much more gentle on the stomach and intestines. I’ve been taking the iron since Saturday, March 7th: 100mg per day of the capsules and 4tbsp (20ml) per day of the liquid stuff.
That is to say, I’ve been taking three times the recommended dosage of the capsules, and two times the recommended dosage of the liquid, because I lose so much blood every month, and because a year ago last April, when I was in the emergency room, I was told I may need a blood transfusion with all the blood I’d lost (I declined treatment, I just wanted to go home cuz I’d had a horrible hospital experience).

Tuesday is when the cycle got very heavy and painful. That day was the Full Moon. My pain level was at a 7-8 all day on the pain scale. I went through a lot of Tylenol 3 that day. So much in fact that I’d wager to say I overdosed a bit, because by evening time I had mild hallucinations and found it difficult to breathe. Despite having taken so much Tylenol 3, I was highly productive on Tuesday. Being that high allowed me to dissociate from the pain and work on my YouTube video quite a bit.

On Wednesday, I woke from a medication-induced nightmare which left me on edge for much of the morning because it involved friends disowning me. The pain and bleeding was moderately heavy, but it fluctuated all day. I ranged from a 4 to a 7.5 on the pain scale for much of the day, but despite that, I was very tired and listless all day. I refused pain medication for much of the day because I didn’t like how much I’d taken the day before. It wasn’t until around 9:30pm that I resumed taking Tylenol 3, because the pain and bleeding ramped up again. I went to bed feeling 8 on the pain scale.

Thursday is when I had my Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.
First off, I woke up from another medication-induced nightmare in which tornadoes, my father, my husband and some friends were involved.
But I fully expected to feel better after having two heavy pain and bleedy days. This was not the case. If you can believe it, the bleeding was even heavier than the previous two days. I was soaking a pad an hour, I was dizzy, off balance, disoriented. I took my pain meds and considered whether I should go to hospital emergency. Every time I stood up or adjusted my position, I soaked a pad.
I had just stood up and had picked up my bottle of orange juice, when the lid popped off and the bottle fell from my hands, splashing all over the place. It wasn’t even 10:30am yet. I wrote about it after cleaning everything up, but my bad day didn’t end, there. After cleaning up the mess, my pain got considerably worse of course, what with all the stooping, bending and mopping I had done. I took my rice heating pads to the kitchen to heat them up in the microwave, and shrieked.

Ants!

We’ve been having trouble with ants for the past few weeks, and have tried several remedies. The ants always find a new way into the house. In the two and a half years we’ve lived here, we’d never had ant invasions until this year. Because of the recurring ant invasions, I’ve come to scrutinize any room I enter before going about my business in that room. This means that I had just been in the kitchen less than an hour prior to my re-entry, and there were no ants. And yet here they were now, a full busy highway of them. They had found my cats’ water dish but surprisingly not their kibble. They were having an all out pool party in the water bowl. Miscellaneous ants crawled about the kitchen, checked out the liquor shelf, and cruised alongside the bottom of the refrigerator. The source of their entry was through an opening in the cabinets below the kitchen counter. This is the area – that entire back wall of the kitchen – in which the ants have been trying to come in through various sources for weeks, now. They’ve even tried coming in through light switches.

Upon entering the kitchen and seeing this, I put down my heating pads and sobbed. I had to clean up this mess NOW, or else I’d go mad, and the ants would be in the cat food and in the fridge within minutes.

Good thing I’d already popped a second Tylenol 3.

I set to work with the ‘Bugs R Done’ orange spray. After coating the kitchen in that stuff, I opened windows to air out the house, and mopped up ant carcasses. To the latest entry point, I applied ‘Ant Eater’ brand anticide, which contains diatomaceous earth and clove oil. I then stripped down and took a nice hot shower. While showering, several ants streamed out of the towel rack in the shower and began running up and down the shower wall.
I sobbed and sobbed. Depression set in full force at this point.

My husband came home early from work, bringing peppermint and cinnamon oils in tow. He moved the fridge out, cleaned up under it, and we applied soaked cotton full of the oils to various potential ant entry points around the kitchen.

I went to bed early last night – around 9:30pm – as the bleeding tapered off. I laid in bed first listening to progressive relaxation tapes, then reading The Witching Hour – a book I first fell in love with back in 1995. I had three heating pads on various parts of my body. I finally was able to get to sleep around midnight.

We’ve not had any further ants and hopefully it’ll stay that way.

Today I am feeling better. I’m back to spotting again. I have mild to moderate low back pain. The problem today is that around 9am this morning I had black, bloody stools. This is important to note in relation to my iron supplement discussion above, because it is a sign of iron toxicity. Insofar as symptoms go, I also have metallic taste in my mouth, and a headache. So I’ll be laying off the iron supplements altogether until I see my doctor. I have an appointment today at 2:45pm.

Tomorrow, I’ll be up in Calistoga for an all day spa event for a bride-to-be. I’m a bridesmaid in her wedding next month, and so we are treating ourselves and the bride to massages, swimming, relaxing, and dinner. We’ll cap off the night with a girly slumber party and then come back home on Sunday.

This Monday, it’s the 16-year anniversary of a local nightclub, and so my husband and I will be heading out to that.

Coming up this Tuesday, I have an appointment with Social Security Disability Insurance, which will likely be a waste of my time. I set up the appointment yesterday in the throes of my depression, because I am feeling unemployable again due to the fact that I have just missed another week of potential work, and I can’t shake it from my head that the last job might have continued had I not been out sick for nearly a full week every month, and the daycare agency never called me back when I asked to be reinstated (that’s the same agency that told me “I knew it! Every time I need you you are not available!” in August, 2008, because they seemed to only call me on a monthly basis, and when I was bedridden).

I talked to state disability yesterday. They told me that per their rules, they can only pay out a maximum of 55% of one’s paycheck, which means one must be inable to work for more than 14 days out of each month. Because I can work 23-26 days out of each month, I do not qualify as disabled per their requirements. So although I am potentially unemployable due to my health conditions, I fall through the cracks for state assistance. I was referred by state to federal. I know that will be a joke, too, but at least they’ll take time to interview me rather than just deny me outright.

This Tuesday, I also have an interview for a nanny position. I know I will ace the interview because I am confident in my skills and educational background. But I am not confident I will get the job once they find out about my health condition. I go back and forth on the issue of whether or not to divulge my health condition.
We’ll see how it goes.

Next Saturday, I’ve got an appointment to get my hair coloured. I’ve not done anything colour-wise with my hair since the wedding five months ago. I’ve been letting all the colour and length grow out so I can get the copper and red tones I originally wanted before that one hairstylist screwed up my hair just weeks before our wedding last year. The woman I’ll be seeing next Saturday is the miracle worker who fixed what the other hairdresser had done to me.

Alarming

Well holy shit. I thought the spotting before my period, with dirty blood, started sometime around September 2008. I am wrong!

It’s been going on since at least January, 2008. The ovarian cyst may just have been an extension of that. What else is going on with me?

Yeah you guessed it, now I’m all worried again.

Today’s symptoms so far:

  • Alternating manic energy and extreme fatigue
  • Clay-coloured stool (from all the Tylenol 3 and Ibuprofen, which means my liver and kidneys are under duress again)
  • Bleedy ass (constipation from ovarian cyst, further exacerbated by all the Tylenol 3)
  • Low-level nausea (probably cyst-related)
  • Easily overheating upon any exertion
  • Racing heart/anxiety (likely due to cabin fever and the manic energetic upswings, halted by not being able to do much with the energy because body won’t cooperate)
  • Continued low back pain
  • Dizziness upon sitting or standing, sometimes when walking (I’ve bumped into walls twice today from loss of balance, and I wasn’t on meds at the time)

The bleeding has subsided once again, as have the uterine/pelvic cramps.

Although I started spotting last Thursday, I didn’t actually start bleeding with normal flow until Sunday. Which means I had two days of heavy flow (Sunday and Monday). I had barely any bleeding on Tuesday until 11:20pm, then I had severe pain and bleeding all night. Woke looking like a ghost this morning and the bleeding subsided again.

This is not normal.

I called my GYN office and left a message asking for advice on cysts and low menstrual flow. I continued searching google for the answer to my question – Can An Ovarian Cyst Stop Menstruation?

I finally found the answer, which is yes, a cyst can stop menstruation.

The next question then is, Does That Mean Blood Is Building Up Behind The Cervix? I.e. I Will Be In For Major Pain When The Cervix Has To Dilate To Pass The Clots Which Have Built Up…

Update on doctors and Endometriois

The pain is unbearable at 1:44pm. I’m already considering calling an ambulance.

The bleeding started gushing around 1:20pm. The pain followed immediately. This is the third menstrual cycle I’ve had which started off very slowly and with dark brown blood. I started late Thursday afternoon, with only the tiniest spotting of dark brown. The pain level was the same as it’s been all month, and centered mostly in the lower back and sides as it has been.
Today is the first day with real, hard core pain, and the blood is getting redder now, less brown “dirty” blood.

I told my spouse yesterday that it’s bad when I have the brown blood, because it means it’s clotting back behind my cervix, and eventually will have to come out, and that’s what causes the cramps, because my cervix has to dilate to push the clots through.

I took one Tylenol 3 – I’m about to take another one after only half an hour. I’m in unbelievable pain. I am afraid. I am home alone. My spouse went off to band practice.

If I make the decision to go to the hospital, I will call my spouse first, and call a local friend second to see if they can take me. Failing that, I call the ambulance.

Regarding my gynecologist, she finally called me back Wednesday afternoon, and was apologetic – she hadn’t typed up the notes from our visit on November 7th because the tiny room we were in had no computer hookup. She said she’d forgotten what all had taken place. We discussed it together, and she remembered as we talked. She said she was putting it all in the computer then, and would give me my referral. She gave me the number to call, but warned I’d not likely get through anytime soon because of the long holiday (Thanksgiving) weekend. She was right.
We discussed what to do should I end up in unmanageable pain again. She said the E.R. is the best place to go because they’ll run blood tests while I’m in the thick of pain, and can do ultrasound or whatever needs to happen right then and there, and give me more powerful meds. I told her I would go next time.

Well here we are I think at ‘next time’.

I’m getting nauseous from the pain. Giving it a few minutes as now the first Tylenol 3 is kicking in as far as being stoned goes. Perhaps I won’t need another. I’m regulating my breathing and talking myself down from panic mode. Journaling helps immensely.

This morning I performed Chi Nei Tsang on myself, because I was tired of having the brown blood. I wanted the flow to start already. I was mad at the cyst and at my body for being broken. I knew that because there was no pain and blood flow right from Thursday evening, it meant that I’d have to miss work again for up to 3 days. This in turn stresses me out because I fear being fired again.

As soon as the pain set in, I emailed my employer and told her what was going on. I’d sent a status update last night, too, so she knows there had been no pain and that late pain arrival was inevitable.

This morning I ate two bowls of gluten-free cereal with almond milk, had a piece of pumpkin pie (minus the crust) with homemade whipped cream (full dairy), and later on, I had some gluten-free white cheddar popcorn (corn/rice puffs). I’ve had two out of three cups of detox tea (kidney and liver tea) today, and have taken 1 ginger capsule and 1 uva ursi capsule today.

I think that’s all the food I’ve eaten. Now that I have Tylenol 3 in me, I’m hungry again. I always get the munchies on Tylenol 3.

I did not take any Ibuprofen today. I wasn’t in much pain until the sudden onset after 1pm, and there was no time to try the Ibuprofen – the pain level shot up to ‘7’ on the scale and called for the big guns, so I took the Tylenol 3.

The spasming uterine pain is fading. Being reclined in bed with the rice bag heating pad helps. I just got a sudden pain in the chest, however. I get that a lot when on Tylenol 3. I know this stuff can kill me.

I am afraid, mad at my body, depressed at losing another sunny day, alternating feeling sorry for myself and mad. The bad feelings do not help my condition. I need to love myself unconditionally despite the illness. I need to find personal strength in this, rather than wallowing in the superficial and the sensory world around me.

Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t believe I am personally the cause of my illness. I’ve had this since onset of menstruation at age 14, when I was still considered a child. Three of my four aunts have Endometriosis, and so did their mother – my grandmother.

There are new agers out there who say I caused my own illness, that I came into this world with a choice and I chose to be ill. They call it “Law of Attraction.”
Even some of the alternative medicine people I’ve tried to see over the years have purported this to me.

Those people need to spend some special time with the necklace.

Well, the pain is stable. It’s stopped ramping up. And I still have a load of laundry out back to take care of. Ugh. I think the neighbors will just have to wait, or move my stuff outta their way if they want the washer.

Status on ovarian cyst

Ever since getting diagnosed with a 4cm ovarian cyst on November 7th, I’ve had pain consistently since then.

I did have a good couple of days this weekend that were partly pain-free with regards to the ovarian cyst. But then the pain returned today. I was at a baby shower sitting on a hard chair when the pain hit. I got up and paced around for a bit in another room, then stood through the rest of the event. I had to take 800mg Ibuprofen halfway through the event because of the pain.

The pain feels like it is in both ovaries, now, and I still have the low back pain. Within 4 hours of taking the Ibuprofen, I took half a Tylenol 3. It is not good to take medication right now, because I’m on the herbal detox program, trying to clean out my kidneys and liver, and the medication is what puts a load on the kidneys and liver.

On Friday I had called my GYN again – I’d been leaving messages all week – and finally got through to someone who told me the blood test I took came back fine. That is, I am not anaemic.
But I wanted to know, why do I have to wait 6 weeks to be checked again if the ovarian cyst is already at 4cm? From all that I’m reading, 4cm is the threshold for when one should get a radiology appointment for cancer screening. I want that screening NOW, not in 6 weeks.
I was told I’d get a call back. I never did.

I will call my GYN again tomorrow and try again to be seen earlier than 6 weeks.

The pain is with me every day when I have to sit in my car and drive (an hour or longer each way, depending on traffic). The pain occurs whenever I sit on hard surfaces or have to lean forward, or twist my torso.

The pain feels like I have a full stomach, a full bladder, and am constipated. But I am not constipated because on the herbal detox program, I’ve been having a movement up to 3 times per day.

The pain went away on Friday evening and then returned here and there on Saturday, leaving again by Saturday evening, then returning again by afternoon today.

I’ve never had pelvic region pain last this long before. I want this cyst to be reabsorbed already, dammit. I fear I’ll have no reprieve from the pain before my next menstrual cycle, and that REALLY pisses me off.
George is slated to arrive Thanksgiving Day weekend, and again for Christmas. I’m really just NOT happy right now to also be hosting a huge ovarian cyst which takes any uptime away from me inbetween the downtime.

Breakfast: 1 bowl trader joe’s protein crunch cereal with rice milk
Lunch: trader joe’s sushi rolls, hot tea w/ vanilla creamer
Any snacks: flax-seed chips and salsa, red mountain dew

Sooo, I got to catch up on a lot of stuff. Again.

I went for ultrasound to the abdomen and pelvic region on June 28th. I watched the ultrasound screen as the intern rolled the device thingy over me, and I saw her marking black spots. I worried a bit, but said to her that my mom had ovarian cysts when she was my age, so I wouldn’t be surprised whatever turned up.

The intern didn’t confirm nor deny anything. She was trained well. I couldn’t even guess from her face. She was a cute thang recently imported from Georgia, too, so it was fun to talk with her about the South.

I was told my doctor would get the results from the ultrasounds within a couple of days.
Days passed, no word. But that’s good. Nevertheless, I began to worry. I began to do the hypochondriac “what if” scenarios. I wouldn’t have been so worried had I not had an increase in ovarian pain on the left side – it’s been steadily increasing since the visit to the gynecologist on June 14th.
My bf and I had what amounted to a sex marathon over a few days (sometimes that happens! ;) And the pain only got worse. I had to run to the bathroom to cry from the pain at one point.

So because of the increase in pain, I fell into the “what if” routine and by yesterday I was nearly panicked half to death over anticipation of the test results today.

Today I worked a half day and drove out to East Oaktown to see the doc. I love that doctor, even if I did gross her out with my specimen. :)

She refused the specimen politely, and I learned that humagus “squid” like that are common, even in normal menstrating chix.

The doc went over the ultrasound results and told me that I have an ovarian cyst.

But get this, it doesn’t explain the pain I’ve been having, because the cyst is on the right ovary, the pain is on the left!!

I was informed that the cyst is about 11mm – that means it’s as big as my alien baby in my tit was, back in 2002.

So anyway, the doc sez that in medical speak, ALL unfertilised eggs are cysts. And sometimes, an egg comes out and just gets STUCK in the hallway, so to speak. ;)
Doc sez most likely it will dissolve, and she said that’s also common, a.k.a normal, for women to get such ovarian cysts. She says rarely do they become inflamed or infected. But we’ll keep an eye on mine, she said.

The good news is that the rest of the ultrasound came out normal – no cancer spots, no fibroids, no abnormal thickening of the uterine walls, etc.
Same with abdominal ultrasound – perfect picture.

I’m glad i’m not terminally ill or some shit – actually I’m ECSTATIC. Now you see why my mood is set to “a bit cheerful, considering”.

But wait, there’s more!

The doctor thinks much of the pain I’m having is due to continuous pockets of air in my intestines that are causing the pain, which presses down cuz it’s inflating the intestines… presses down on my bladder and girl parts, exacerbating george pain, and creating sex pain.

Doc sez she believes that this air issue I have is Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS).

My dad has just been diagnosed with IBS this past year.

And get this, my mom had an ovarian cyst at my age, as I’ve stated previously.

Doc sent me home with more drugs to try for the preliminary diagnosis of IBS, and a refill on the T3, and I have to read all I can on IBS.

Doc even brought out a huge medical book for me to glance over while she told me about IBS. She was hugely impressed with my endo charts and the copying of my own medical records and said she’d pore over it all.

I go back to see Doc in a month, and she’ll have figured out by then where to send me next for tests.

In the meantime, I have to wipe poo on a card and take it in this week to her to send off for analysis.

To sum up, the doc still thinks my Endo complaint is valid, but today she pushed IBS as a more probable issue in conjunction with dysmenorrhea. She’s not ruling out Endometriosis, though.

So my current dietary experiment (which so far is in its 2nd month of FAILURE) has to be fully re-assessed to now include IBS restrictions, Just In Case, so ordered the doc.

I got home and called up my dad. My dad rocks. He understands these are preliminary findings by my doc and he wasn’t phased by that or the cyst at all.

My mom, on the other hand, will freak. So I might not tell her at all.

Dad told me IBS is largely dietary and therefore is 100% curable, and he recommended some dietary fiber supplements, foods to avoid, and told me about the pills he was on (which are different from the pills I’ll be on. Oh, I didn’t mention that part – I’ll be taking Donnatal as necessary, so I have to read up on that, too).

Listening to my dad relaxed me even more about all of this, and like I said, I am already ecstatic that nothing life-threatening was found.

Though I’m still troubled by the pain near my left ovary.